SEB

Tuesday, 2/6/18 Hello Brandon, I get to go to a lecture by George Durrant and Susan Easton Black again today at 2. Janice Divine says she went by at 1 last Tuesday and there were people lined up to go in. (An hour early!!) I don’t think anyone will take the seat I discovered last week. I sit on the kiddie stool that they use to prop kids up for their testimonies! It is placed on the stand on the east side just behind the Priest’s sacrament bench. I sat there last week for the first time. I went in at 1:45 and they had already begun because the building was full. What? Mormons early to a meeting? What in the world is going on? @ I have a emeritus drugged out Nephew, Nate’95 who says he took the sacrament for the first time in years this week. He posted 98 times on fb last week. When I saw how much he was posting and since I didn’t have you to need me so much, I felt inspired to invite him to write a joint blog with me. He chose the name onwardandupward2.blogspot.com from the choices I offered him. He could have made up a name of his own but he didn’t. 10 days have gone by on that blog. He has contributed 3 times. Yes! @ I was feeling lost and incapable and impatient about dialoguing with him on Sunday. As I reclined in my prayer chair I got an idea. Yes, I was praying in my prayer chair. The idea was, that I really didn’t need to wait any longer. By starting the joint blog I had crossed a bridge. Nate had joined me. My messages on fb might be more acceptable to him now. I facebooked him and he responded. Then the next day he wrote on our blog. Live and Learn. I am just feeling this one out. @As you know I often just use intials for apostles: LTP, JS, BY, GBH, TSM, DHO, RMN, MRB, HBE, DFU, etc. I am going to use SEB for Susan Easton Black. Last week she told us how OCD she is. She hunted for years for every different name used for Jesus Christ in the Book of Mormon. I love Jesus Christ. I decided to hunt up all those names. This is what I found on the internet:101 names of Christ in the book of Mormon by Susan Easton Black


Almighty


Almighty God


Alpha and Omega


Being


Beloved


Beloved Son


Christ


Christ Jesus


Christ the Son


Counselor


Great Creator


Great Spirit


Head


Holy Child


Holy God


Holy Messiah


Holy One


Holy One of Israel


Holy One of Jacob


Husband


Immanuel


Jehovah


Jesus


Jesus Christ


Keeper of the gate


King


King of heaven


Lamb


Lamb of God


Lord


Lord God


Lord God Almighty


Lord God omnipotent


Lord God of Hosts


Lord Jehovah


Lord Jesus


Lord Jesus Christ


Lord of Hosts


Lord of the vineyard


Lord Omnipotent


Maker


Man


Master


Mediator


Messiah


Mighty God


Mighty One of Israel


Mighty One of Jacob


Most High


Most High God


Only Begotten of the Father


Only Begotten Son


Prince of Peace


Prophet


Rabbanah


Redeemer


Only Begotten Son


Prince of Peace


Redeemer of Israel


Redeemer of the world


Rock


Savior


Savior Jesus Christ


Savior of the World


Shepherd


Son


Son of God


Son of Righteousness


Son of the Eternal Father


Son of the Everlasting God


Son of the Living God


Son of the Most High God


Stone


Supreme Being


Supreme Creator


True and living God


True Messiah


True shepherd


True vine


Well Beloved


Wonderful


The guy who copied her pages from her book must have blown it. Where are the rest? On her chart she shows which books each name is found in and how many times. When I attended her lecture last Tuesday I was disappointed she didn’t share the awesome stories about JS’s childhood or life that she had 2 weeks before. But as the days went by I realized how what she had shared had touched me. As you know the Book of Mormon proclaims to be another witness of/for Jesus Christ. You won’t believe this brandon, she found him in the first verse and the last verse and every 1.7 verses in between. Have you ever noticed what name is used for him in the first verse? Or the last verse? Eternal Judge is the one used in the last verse. That one scares her she says. @ In order to get a list of His names I used Dragon speak to dictate them all. I felt a special spirit just saying them. Guess how it compares to the OT and the NT? @ What a creative blessing the BoM is for us. @@@ I doubled my paxil yesterday. My feelings have been so labile/ mercurial/ fluctuating/ undulating/ unpredictable this last month. Instead of taking a half pill I took a whole one. Yippee, I have the option!


Understanding Emotional Lability


Emotional lability occurs because of damage to parts of the brain that control: Awareness of emotions (ours and others) Ability to control how emotions are expressed – so ability to inhibit or stop emotions coming out Stronger emotional responses When a person is emotionally labile emotions can be out of proportion to the situation or environment the person is in. For example, a person may cry, even when they are not unhappy – they may cry just in response to strong emotions or feelings, or it may happen “out of the blue” without warning. A person may have little control over the expression of these strong emotions, and they may not be connected to any specific event or person. Following brain injury an individual may also lose emotional awareness and sensitivity to their own and other’s emotions, and therefore their capacity to control their emotional behaviour may also be reduced. They may overreact to people or events around them – conversations about particular topics, sad or funny movies or stories. Weaker emotional control and lower frustration tolerance, particularly with fatigue and stress can also result in more extreme changes in emotional responses. The person may express their emotions in situations where previously they would have been able to been restrained or in control (in quiet situations, in church, listening to a concert, the library). These behaviours can be confusing, embarrassing, and difficult to understand for the person with brain injury and for others. @@@ I lost my inhibitions Sunday and greeted: “Hal, Jesus didn’t go whoring!” @ Oops, looks like I am feeling things to strongly. I am so glad I have kept dosing with at least a half a pill each day so increasing the dosage won’t be difficult. TYHF. @ It is hard to admit that mental illness runs in my family. Not, me. I’m not crazy! @@@ Steve Burdick asked to be a Facebook friend this weekend. Usually I check them out and see who they are first. This time I figured if he wants to be friends it is OK with me. Lo and behold he messages me that he so appreciated my blog about the Funeral of Jake Foote that I wrote in 2014! He just found out about it and he said my blog filled him in and gave him peace. What? Did I write a blog about Jake Foote? I wondered what I called it and how he found it? I googled Jake Foote and sure enough there was AdventureBill with his blog. :) \\\Wednesday 2/7/18 Hello Brandon, I am about done at family search today. Here is a talk I wanted to reread because she read it so fast in church in December. @@@Joni, Are you up to sharing your talk?\
I know I would benefit from rereading it. I also write and inmate who I like to share wonderful ward talks with. I post everything on adventurebill1, my blogspot. No one bothers to read it but it makes me feel productive.\So not only are you not teaching gospel doctrine any more, but neither are your replacements! So long ShannonJ and JesseB.\I have told Alex that I like how his brain works. FrankH commented on his talk in priesthood.\Thank you for your consideration.\Joni Gardine\Feb 2 (5 days ago)to me
Vern, I've attached a copy of my talk from a month ago. I hope it does some good. :)\
vern jensen <phonev6@gmail.com>\Feb 2 (5 days ago)\to Joni \Yay!\You win!\Thank you.\It will do me some good if no one else! :) [bps, smily faces all over the place. So Brandon, Joni told me she was willing when we crossed paths as I distributed my special children’s ages ward phone list on a legal sheet. If she had gotten me hers quickly, she has a new baby son, her first son, 4 daughters, I would have tried for her intimidating tall attorney husbands talk as well. Now it is long enough ago I won’t bother. ] Today is New Year’s Eve. Some of you may be big on New Year’s resolutions--others not so much. I think it is safe to say that most of us do a little looking inward as a year draws to a close. [bps, had a huge year!] Whatever your approach to the New Year, I propose that you add to your year-end-soul searching the question, “What does my Heavenly Father need me to FORGIVE?” Search your heart and see if there is not some lingering resentment, some grudge, something that has laid unforgiven, whether large or small that is holding you back from what the Lord needs you to be. Think of it like two tight fists. (hold up fists) If you hold on like this, refusing to let go on past wrongs, either that have been done to you, or those you have done and can’t seem to forgive yourself for--holding on tightly, your hands are not open to receive. When you choose to forgive yourself and others YOU are opening your hands to receive what the Lord has in store for you. [this demonstration was involving Brandon,v]


We obviously know that we are commanded to forgive. The Lord said, “10 I, the Lord, will forgive whom I will forgive, but of you it is required to forgive all men. (d&C 64:10). As in all things, Christ is who we should look to as our greatest example. He showed us how importance forgiveness was multiple times during his life, but never as profoundly as during his crucifixion. Jesus Christ literally stopped in the middle of unimaginable pain--dying on the cross--to forgive. And, not for someone remorseful, repentant and begging for forgiveness, either. [good point-v]


He paused in the middle of his suffering to plead to the Father for forgiveness for those who had crucified him, praying “forgive them, for they know not what they do” [they knew not, they had no idea! Even the leaders really had no idea! Nothing like this had ever happened before. How were they supposed to understand. The apostles couldn’t even understand there would be a resurrection! But what about kindness? That was the leaders major fault in my opinion. How often are we kind?-v]


I believe that there are some lessons here for us in this final act of Christ that can help us in our journey to practice forgiveness more fully in our lives. I’d like to focus first on the manner in which He prayed for those who had harmed him.


Praying for those that have hurt us is an incredibly powerful thing. When it comes to seeking to forgive, I believe there is no step more important. It’s not always easy, and sometimes the words come slowly, but the result has always been the same. Each time I am amazed at the peace and love that washes over me for the person I am praying for. Now, to be perfectly honest, there have been times that after returning to my feet and going about my day, the unkind feelings have returned. I have needed to repeat this praying process many times over days, weeks, and in one particular case, years, but the results have been miraculous. [This reminded me of the opening scene of “Fiddler on the Roof,” in which the rabbi's son asks if there is “a proper blessing for the czar.” ... He ponders awhile, then pronounces: “Of course: May God bless and keep the czar — far away from us.” I can't do this yet Brandon. I am still at the protect myself stage.-v]


All of us have hurtful things happen to us. We cannot escape it. It is a necessary part of this human experience. Often the deepest pain comes from those closest to us. When such things happen, praying for those that have hurt us can bring healing and peace.


So it was with Moses. While he was leading the children of Israel through the wilderness to the promised land, his brother Aaron and sister Miriam became jealous of him. They gossiped about Moses, saying hurtful things about him and his wife. How many of us can unfortunately relate to his feelings of betrayal that Moses must have felt? Moses prayed for them, and most specifically for Miriam who had contracted leprosy. Heavenly Father heard the prayers of Moses and Miriam was healed. Their relationship was healed, as well.


We are all familiar with the story of Job--his struggles and misfortunes were more than many of us could bear. He lost his livelihood, his family and his health. During this time, his friends judged him and his situation.They told him that he had brought these things upon himself, that he must have done something to deserve it. Put yourself in Job’s position--Has something similar happened to you? Have you been judged wrongly, even by those closest to you even in the midst of a difficult time in your life? It can be difficult in situations such as this to feel forgiveness in your heart. God chastised the friends of Job. BUT--He also told Job to pray for them.


I can imagine that what happened to Job was something similar to what I have experienced when I have prayed for those that have hurt me or for whom I have unkind feelings. A feeling of peace has come over me and I am amazingly, in that moment[v-but only in that moment!], able to love them and see them as children of God. I am granted perspective I did not have before. I see things through a lens of love and clarity. My load seems lighter. I think that is what it means in the scriptures when it says:10 And the Lord turned the captivity of Job, when he prayed for his friends[I don't understand this yet.v]:It was also an important piece of the healing process for everyone involved. The scriptural account of Job goes on to say, :11 Then came there unto him all his brethren, and all his sisters, and all they that had been of his acquaintance before, and did eat bread with him in his house: and they bemoaned him, and comforted him over all the evil that the Lord had brought upon him: every man also gave him a piece of money, and every one an earring of gold.The hearts of his friends had been changed, as well.\


Another thing that struck me about this account of Christ forgiving on the cross is that : HE DID IT QUICKLY--EVEN IN THE MIDST OF HIS SUFFERING\He didn’t waste any time. He did not put conditions on his forgiveness, such as waiting until they were sorry, until they asked for forgiveness, or until they saw they were wrong. I understand that there are things that are incredibly hurtful that quite honestly take time to process, sort out and handle.[well said. v] There are also things that happen to us , small grievances, throughout the day that we should forgive quickly and move on. Instead, we may find it tempting to roll around in the grudge a bit, prolonging the drama of it all. This is not the Lord’s way. Whether the offense is large or small, I believe that the Lord is teaching us here to forgive as quickly as we can. The Lord admonishes us in Matthew that we should settle our disputes quickly, which is very sound advice. I believe that this encompasses forgiving and moving on, as well. The quicker we can do it, the quicker we are able to feel the full presence of the Spirit with us again and the stronger our relationships will be. [ I usually add up the offenses and keep track until I can't take any more. v]


There is a wonderful example from the lives of Joseph and Emma Smith that illustrates this point. The following is from the writings of David Whitmer, who witnessed the incident:\“Joseph Smith was a religious and straightforward man. . . . He had to trust in God. He could not translate unless he was humble and possessed the right feelings towards everyone.\To illustrate so you can see: One morning when he was getting ready to continue the translation, something went wrong about the house and he was put out about it. Something that Emma, his wife, had done.\Oliver and I went upstairs and Joseph came up soon after to continue the translation but he could not do anything. He could not translate a single syllable.\He went downstairs, out into the orchard, and made supplication to the Lord; was gone about an hour—came back to the house, and asked Emma’s forgiveness and then came upstairs where we were and then the translation went on all right.\He could do nothing save he was humble and faithful.”\Now--an important point is that, according to David Whitmer--it was Emma who had done something that upset Joseph--not the other way around. But, what is wonderful is that Joseph prayed and thereafter came to ask forgiveness of EMMA. Often when we pray and meditate upon a certain offense, we are able to see our own part in the matter more clearly. He took responsibility for his part, asked for Emma’s forgiveness and was blessed with the Spirit again and the ability to translate.


So it is with us. If we are holding onto a grudge, an offense, or even an annoyance that we let fester--we harm our relationships, and block ourselves from the full measure of the Spirit, leaving us unable to move forward with what the Lord has for us to do. Like Joseph Smith, we should take care of it as soon as possible.When we make forgiving quickly a habit we are better able to devote our energies to our families and other worthwhile things in our lives.


Pres. James E. Faust shared the following:


“If we can find forgiveness in our hearts for those who have caused us hurt and injury, we will rise to a higher level of self-esteem and well-being. Some recent studies show that people who are taught to forgive become “less angry, more hopeful, less depressed, less anxious and less stressed,” which leads to greater physical well-being.9 Another of these studies concludes “that forgiveness … is a liberating gift [that] people can give to themselves. .”


I particularly love that last sentence :forgiveness … is a liberating gift [that] people can give to themselves.” Doesn’t it make sense that if all of these benefits await us on the other side of forgiveness, we should try to get there as quickly as we can?


Another lesson from Christ is that HE HAD PERSPECTIVE:


Christ saw these men who had crucified him as SONS OF GOD. He had a knowledge of them and a love for them that we could only aspire to emulate. He also knew that, in his words “they know not what they do”. We can apply this in our own lives, as we try to put ourselves in the place of others, giving them the benefit of the doubt, trying to see things from their perspective. [I agree. Top marks for this one! v]


Christ also kept an eternal perspective. He knew that in three days he would be resurrected, that this was not the end. When you know that what God has before you is bigger than what has happened behind you, you are better able to put hurtful things in context. Forgiveness becomes easier.


Mark Nepo, a philosopher, tells the following story:


A spiritual teacher grew tired of his student complaining, and so, one morning, sent him for some salt. When the student returned, the teacher instructed the unhappy young man to put a handful of salt in a glass of water and then to drink it.


“How does it taste?” the teacher asked.


“Bitter,” said the student.


The teacher chuckled and then asked the young man to take the same handful of salt and put it in the lake. The two walked in silence to the nearby lake, and once the student swirled his handful of salt in the water, the old man said, “Now drink from the lake.”


As the water dripped down the young man’s chin, the teacher asked, “How does it taste?”


“Fresh,” remarked the student.


“Do you taste the salt?” asked the teacher.


“No,” said the young man.


At this, the teacher said, “The pain of life is pure salt; no more, no less. The amount of pain in life remains the same, exactly the same. But the amount of bitterness we taste depends on the container we put the pain in. So when you are in pain, the only thing you can do is to enlarge your sense of things. . . . Stop being a glass. Become a lake.”


To me, this story illustrates the power of putting things in their proper perspective. This is best done by trying to see ourselves and others as Christ does.


(ENDING) Dr. Sidney Simon,an author, provided an excellent definition of forgiveness:


“Forgiveness is freeing up and putting to better use the energy once consumed by holding grudges, harboring resentments, and nursing unhealed wounds. It is rediscovering the strengths we always had and relocating our limitless capacity to understand and accept other people and ourselves.”5


On this New Years Eve, as you look on to a new year, follow Christ’s example of forgiving. Leave the grudges, the self inflicted wounds, even the purposeful hurts brought about by others behind. Furthermore, forgive yourself for those sins you have repented of and for the weaknesses that seem to show up everyday. Show the compassion to yourself that you would show those that you love. Pray for those who have hurt you, those you find difficult to forgive.


Start fresh with open hands and an open heart, ready for the Lord to use you for his ultimate good. [I wish and I try. v]


Know that what God has in store for you is beyond what you can comprehend at this time. To whom much is given, much is required. You can’t expect God to use you to a higher capacity if your heart and mind are consumed with an old hurt. Your Saviour Jesus Christ has brought about the Atonement which covers these wrongs. Take them to Him. Lay them at His feet. He will heal your heart and mind. He will heal your relationships. He has that power. Your Heavenly Father has so many blessings in store for you, if you would simply unclench your fists, let the grudges, resentments, and offenses go--and come to Him with open hands and open hearts ready to serve and love.[It is so much harder than that!v]


I know that He will bless you and through you, bless the lives others more fully if you will make the choice to forgive.


AMEN

Joni Gardine was our gospel doctrine teacher 2 years ago. She was tall a great to look at. As you can tell she can think! I do all I can to support gospel teachers. So as you can imagine she knows me very well from the classroom. What did you think of her talk? What did you think of my comments? Did you agree or disagree? @ Thurs 2/8/18 I got a phone call from Heidi yesterday. I called back while walking Molly near midnight. No answer of course. :) Who was Heidi? Why would she call me? When I listened to my vmail I heard that she was asking me to substitute for teaching our BoM class since she has elementary teaching obligations. I responded, Sure, I would be happy to. I started getting so excited inside while walking Molly. I am really going to do a dog and pony show. [What is a dog-and-pony show? This disparaging term goes back to the 1920s, when actual dog and pony shows competed with far more elaborate circuses. Many times the dog-and-pony offerings served as a front to hoochie-coochie shows or tents serving illegal alcohol. Over time, in the worlds of politics, business, and the military, the term was transferred to perfunctory or picayune presentations.] Have you ever seen a picture of a soft heart? A hard heart? I found some lds.org coloring book pictures that have them. I will send you one. I am planning to give everyone the pictures and maybe have us take notes around the edges. @ My assignment is the last 4 chapters of 1 Nephi. Nephi starts by telling them about Isaiah, Zenock, Zenos, Neum from the brass plates. They have just arrived in America. Then he copies Isaiah 48 and 49 and then he explains. The adventure of arriving at the promised land is over. Let the preaching begin! 2 Nephi is all preaching too. Wonderful, wonderful books. Written on small plates at the end of Nephi’s life when he thought he was done recording their history. Nope. Not done. Time to make some new plates and on these ones just put the most spiritual things! And we have them. The large plates are like all the newspapers of the world. The small plates are like our General Conference talks. Which do you prefer? @My testimony is particularly strong today. After studying 1N 19 & 22 last night I can see that HF sees and knows the big picture. A few weeks ago I learned that Nephi’s brother Jacob had more feelings than any other prophet in the BoM. In my lability I appreciate others who had strong feelings as well. I was wiped out with the tarring of Joseph Smith lecture I attended on Tuesday. Joseph Smith seems like he was an extremely sensitive man as well. In fact he tells of not needing the Urim and Thummim any more because he had gotten used to seeing things the way it showed him. Can you imagine? @ Joni talked about perspective in her talk. If we can keep the perspective that we are spiritual beings in a temporal world we can let things run off our backs like water on a ducks feathers. As you know words like those in 1N22 are so potent that we can’t take them all in. They blow our minds and we just can’t fathom them any longer. JosephS lamented that he couldn’t prepare the people well enough to accept all the revelations he had received. He just gave them as much as they could handle. And for some of them that was more than they could handle. If we could gaze into heaven for 5 minutes we would know more than reading everything in the world written on the subject. gby-bltpjs-