Wednesday, February 21, 2018

Authentic



Wed. 2/21 @And so it goes; all sects, parties, and denominations acclaim a Christmolded to fit their diverse theological idiosyncrasies. And as we know, this very babble of voices crying out that salvation comes through Christ, according to this or that conflicting system, is itself one of the signs of the times.

Jesus foretold that in our day there would be false Christs and falseprophets, meaning that false religions bearing his name would arise, andthat false doctrines and false teachers would be everywhere.

Amid it all may we raise the one voice which echoes the mind and will and voice of the Lord. Our voice is one which testifies of a true and living Christ; it is one which says that the Lord Jesus has revealed himself and his gospel anew in modern times; it is a voice which invites all men to come to Him who died on Calvary, and to live his laws as he has given them to modern prophets. @ For years I have wondered where all the prophesied false Christs were. BRMcConkie’77 Just told me. I love it when I get/find answers.

@@@All of the virtues and appropriate use of these technologies notwithstanding, there are risks associated with them that, when drawn too close, can put us in a spiritual eclipse and potentially block the brightness and warmth of the gospel.

The use of social media, mobile apps, and games can be inordinately time-consuming and can reduce face-to-face interaction. This loss of personal conversation can affect marriages, take the place of valuable spiritual practices, and stifle the development of social skills, especially among youth.

Two additional risks related to social media are idealized reality and debilitating comparisons.

Many (if not most) of the pictures posted on social media tend to portray life at its very best—often unrealistically. We have all seen beautiful images of home decor, wonderful vacation spots, smiling selfies, elaborate food preparation, and seemingly unattainable body images.

Here, for example, is an image that you might see on someone’s social media account. However, it doesn’t quite capture the full picture of what is actually going on in real life.



Comparing our own seemingly average existence with others’ well-edited, perfectly crafted lives as represented on social media may leave us with feelings of discouragement, envy, and even failure.

One person who has shared numerous posts of her own said, perhaps only partly in jest, “What’s the point of being happy if you’re not going to post it?” DGRenlund’17 oct @@@ I have been candid about ward happenings on purpose. @@@

Repentance Is a Lifelong Pursuit

I have a friend who grew up in a less-active Latter-day Saint family. Whenhe was a young adult, he too “came to himself” and decided to prepare fora mission.

He became an excellent missionary. On his last day before returning home,the mission president interviewed him and asked him to bear histestimony. He did so, and after a tearful embrace, the president said,“Elder, you could forget or deny everything you have just testified of in amatter of months if you do not continue to do the things that built yourtestimony in the first place.”

My friend later told me that he has prayed and read the scriptures dailysince he returned from his mission. Being constantly “nourished by thegood word of God” has kept him “in the right way.”12

You who are preparing for full-time missions and you who are returning,take note! It is not enough just to gain a testimony; you have to maintain itand strengthen it. As every missionary knows, if you stop pedaling a bicycle,it will fall, and if you stop feeding your testimony, it will weaken. This sameprinciple applies to repentance—it is a lifelong pursuit, not a once-in-a-lifetime experience. @When the gas runs out the car stops. Same with our testimonies!

The Eternal Everyday

"Some misuse authenticity as a celebration of the natural man and qualities that are the opposite of humility, kindness, mercy, forgiveness, and civility. We can celebrate our individual uniqueness as children of God without using authenticity as an excuse for un-Christlike behavior." @2/21 This is a concern I have. In being authentic have I been un-Christlike?













Tuesday, February 20, 2018

Lightning Rods

10 days since the last post.

If you read this blog. . . thank you. It is intended for an inmate, and my kids, if they ever want to check on me.

I have this hope and prayer that HF might guide someone here and they will see:

1- It is OK to be candid and honest and to express yourself.

2- That the gospel is alive even in the weakness of this human soul.

3- That the gospel is motivating and brings satisfaction and joy versus misery and pain.

Satan, also called the adversary or the devil, is the enemy of all righteousness and of those who seek to follow God. He is a spirit son of God who was once an angel "in authority in the presence of God" (D&C 76:25; see also Isaiah 14:12D&C 76:26–27). But in the premortal Council in Heaven, Lucifer, as Satan was then called, rebelled against God. Since that time, he has sought to destroy the children of God on the earth and to make them miserable.

4- We can try to entertain each other with the curiosities and puzzlements of life.

5- We need to pat each other and even ourselves on the back when we make worthwhile efforts. When we try hard. Trying matters.

6- The Church of Jesus Christ has apostles that can be trusted. And that I love The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and I am trying to be a worthwhile saint. And that you can too.

7- I am learning and growing all along the way.

I have a wry sense of humor. I am a yellow personality and love fun. I am also a walking wounded and had a horrific, scarring childhood with criminal psychopathic parents.

Some people may hate our bishop, Quincy Adams. Some people hate our stake president, Gil Almquist. Some people hate Joseph Smith and Thomas S Monson and Russel M Nelson. I don't profess to be a prophet of any kind. Although Gary Caldwell used to teach we should all be prophets, and testify of Christ.

I used to shy away from honesty and candidness. I didn't dare say things the way they really are for fear I would be caught out or be found wrong. I don't tend to whine and complain. Dwelling on the bad, sad, and criticizing is more acceptable in our society than cheering the efforts of good people. Who wants to talk about the good and uplifting. How boring. Let's talk about the sins and mistakes and gossip about the perceived weaknesses of others. Who wants to compliment and build up when you can be more accepted by whining and pointing out the faults of others. Who wants to comment in a positive way when something reaches you in a blog compared to spreading possible hurtful observations made.

Have you noticed that even Youtube commenters identify trolls? 

Bishop called me in Sunday morning. Randalls and JenniferR had someone point out to them things to hurt their feelings from my blog.

3 years ago the bishop sat down with me about someone working on repenting I had noticed in sacrament meeting and mentioned in my letter to Brandon, trying to point out to Brandon all can repent. Some people even do! Yes.

Hey, we made 3 years between visits!

Back then I invited whoever felt offended to be my editor and let me know. Every blog entry has a comment section. I have no issue with removing things that may be hurtful.

I fight against the secrecy of sin. My parents kept their nefarious deeds secret. Abusing children needs to be exposed.

I have no issue with human foibles, weaknesses or even lifelong genetic burdens. I applaud those who bear them. I feel for them. I feel for me and my siblings. I have a soft spot in my heart for all those abused. I have a soft spot in my heart for all those burdened by blindness, lameness, mental, emotional or physical or spiritual handicaps. This life is intended to burden us all. Poor me, poor you, poor everyone! But it is intentional. By turning to Christ he will share our burden. We are suppose to need him.

Next, If you have a grudge it is your job to go to the person and make peace with them. If you have been offended the same is true.

Sometimes it is difficult to forgive. Sometimes we are so hurt we just can't forgive.  What then?

That is when we let it go, stay away from that person and protect ourselves. We turn it over to God and we let go. Joseph Smith spoke with a whistle for 11 years. 1832-1843 His two front teeth were broken the night of the tarring. He walked with a limp because his left leg was lame from age 7. He combed his hair over his bald spot where his scalp was ripped out the night of the tarring. Somehow or other he never bore a grudge. His little boy died 3 days after the tarring, his little twin girl survived. Could I forgive men for killing my child? I can't forgive them for abusing me and my children! How could I forgive them for killing one? No way.  But can I turn it over to God?  That I can do.

Satan hates goodness. He has 40 billion spirits that followed him and live here on this planet. They can find every chink in our armor, every weakness in our soul. As we stir others up to anger we are his tools. Contention is not of God.

So once again, I invite you to let me know if you are worried something I have written may hurt someone's feelings. phonev6@gmail.com is my email. Especially if you don't dare to comment right here on my blog.

I can understand the worry of being placed on display or exposed. Some of us are extremely private. I have gotten loose with what I have dared to post. It is only by reminding me, that I can limit my natural inclinations to be too frank.

Don't stir the pot. Keep it to yourself and let me know.

I have gone to great extremes to draw Brandon out. Did you notice in his last letter he finally owned 4 FEELINGS!  And I cheered. I have written thousands and thousands of pages trying to get that to happen. And then finally when I say good bye, this is the end, he responds.

I love you.

God bless you.

PS. I have no problem with apologizing. I make all kinds of insensitive mistakes. I have had a mission. But that part is now done. We'll see how I will be engaged in the future.

Saturday, February 10, 2018

Good bye from Brandon Purgatory Smith



Saturday, 2/10/18 What the heck! A second letter from you this year!! What is going on!!! Hello Brandon. You used 2 pages all 4 sides this time. Congratulations. Thank you. It is dated Feb 5 and although I pulled it from the mailbox yesterday I was too stressed/ anxious to open it until just now. You revealed all kinds of personal feelings. Thank you. You honored my change of writing efforts and focus and years of writing you. Thank you. @ In the last two letters I have told you I am trying to wean myself from daily dialogue with you. And I am succeeding more here now on week 3. Some habits are hard to break. @ Some of the things you say are so cute. (tittys) Thanks for making me smile and expressing a bit of your frustration. I can sure understand. Our old world stimulates us all the time. Sex sells. @ I listened to the sustaining session of conference this morning. Pres Nelson was the closing speaker. He told stories just like TSM used to. He told us to read the BoM every day just like TSM used to. Do you remember how BY looked and sounded like JS in the session of conference to the saints? RMN was almost in the image of TSM this last conference. @The Book of Mormon: What Would Your Life Be Like without It?\By President Russell M. Nelson\President of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles\In 1986, I was invited to give a special lecture at a university in Accra, Ghana. There I met a number of dignitaries, including an African tribal king. As we visited prior to the lecture, the king spoke to me only through his linguist, who then translated for me. I responded to the linguist, and the linguist then translated my responses to the king.
After my lecture, the king made his way directly to me, but this time without his linguist. To my surprise, he spoke in perfect English—the Queen’s English, I might add!
The king seemed puzzled. “Just who are you?” he asked.
I replied, “I am an ordained Apostle of Jesus Christ.”
The king asked, “What can you teach me about Jesus Christ?”
I responded with a question: “May I ask what you already know about Him?”
The king’s response revealed he was a serious student of the Bible and one who loved the Lord.
I then asked if he knew about the ministry of Jesus Christ to the people of ancient America.
As I expected, he did not.
I explained that after the Savior’s Crucifixion and Resurrection, He came to the people of ancient America, where He taught His gospel. He organized His Church and asked His disciples to keep a record of His ministry among them.
“That record,” I continued, “is what we know as the Book of Mormon. It is another testament of Jesus Christ. It is a companion scripture to the Holy Bible.”
At this point, the king became very interested. I turned to the mission president accompanying me and asked if he had an extra copy of the Book of Mormon with him. He pulled one from his briefcase.
I opened it to 3 Nephi chapter 11, and together the king and I read the Savior’s sermon to the Nephites. I then presented the copy of the Book of Mormon to him. His response lodged in my mind and heart forever: “You could have given me diamonds or rubies, but nothing is more precious to me than this additional knowledge about the Lord Jesus Christ.”





My brothers and sisters, how precious is the Book of Mormon to you? If you were offered diamonds or rubies or the Book of Mormon, which would you choose? Honestly, which is of greater worth to you? [Brandon, when I was a little boy I heard Ed Morgan telling my dad stories about gold being hidden up in out mountains because the Lord didn’t want the saints to have it yet. I heard prophecies of the saints being so rich they would have riches piled in the streets in front of their houses. You are making an effort to read the BoM everyday. You are like the King counting out his money! {Wiki:Sing a song of sixpence,\A pocket full of rye.\Four and twenty blackbirds,\Baked in a pie.
When the pie was opened\The birds began to sing;\Wasn't that a dainty dish,\To set before the king.\The king was in his counting house,\Counting out his money;
The queen was in the parlour,\Eating bread and honey.\The maid was in the garden,
Hanging out the clothes,\When down came a blackbird\And pecked off her nose.[1]
The final line of the fourth verse is sometimes slightly varied, with nose pecked or nipped off. One of the following additional verses is often added to moderate the ending:\They sent for the king's doctor,\who sewed it on again;\He sewed it on so neatly,\the seam was never seen.[1]\or:\There was such a commotion,\that little Jenny wren\Flew down into the garden,\and put it back again.} In my family it ended with the pecked of her nose! ] So Brandon do you ever try to cash in on the promises of the prophet? RMN shared a story of his grand daughter missionary promising a college student that his text scores would improve if he read the BoM each day. RMN himself promised us: 


My dear brothers and sisters, I promise that as you prayerfully study the Book of Mormon every day, you will make better decisions—every day. 

I promise that as you ponder what you study, the windows of heaven will open, and you will receive answers to your own questions and direction for your own life. 

I promise that as you daily immerse yourself in the Book of Mormon, you can be immunized against the evils of the day, even the gripping plague of pornography and other mind-numbing addictions.


Whenever I hear anyone, including myself, say, “I know the Book of Mormon is true,” I want to exclaim, “That’s nice, but it is not enough!” We need to feel, deep in “the inmost part” of our hearts,12 that the Book of Mormon is unequivocally the word of God. We must feel it so deeply that we would never want to live even one day without it. I might paraphrase President Brigham Young in saying, “I wish I had the voice of seven thunders to wake up the people”13 to the truth and power of the Book of Mormon. @”even the gripping plague of pornography” He seems to think that this is a difficult one! I absolutely agree. Sexual drives are like physical hunger. They are both appetites that can be stimulated by the things we see and imagine. How are we supposed to control those? Good question. @ Next. I have been so low this last month I decided to take a whole paxil everyday instead of a half starting Monday. I read some articles about it on the internet and got the idea. My brother Spot’77 asked my if I was cosmically inspired yesterday. Thursday and Friday had me so anxious I can’t describe them. Do you like to be stressed occasionally? Well I have had enough for this month! I was excited to accept the responsibility to substitute for our BoM class with 24 hours to prepare. But 4 hours before class began my anxiety was welling up like an overflowing coffee cup. It took me 24 hours to calm down afterwards. And then I had invited janice divine to our ward Valentine’s dinner last night. She squeezed me in between two other appointments. That was our first one on one preplanned date. I was so relieved when the night ended. It was fun but I was so anxious. So thank you paxil! @@@


February 5, 2018 Hey Vern :-),


Good news, bad news, in between news: could be any, or, perhaps all of the above.


You no longer consider me a service project to entertain. Now instead of detailed dialogue of daily activities and conversations you could focus on the heart of certain things. :-) Quality not quantity. Although we do like Titties ;-)


VERN!! Why didn't you say that calendars.com kept your money. Those calendars were returned because the vendor is not approved to send things here.


I was certain I sent you the yellow copy I had of the rejection slip. I can't find it where it should be if I had it. (Dear Brandon, I just didn't have the energy to follow through and get my money back. They were sending you the calendars in different shipments according to when they became available. It was just more than I could deal with.)


Contact them and get your money back. They should have a record of it. So I was a little upset about the unethical calendar company. I can't do anything about it so I have to let it go.


Okay, :-)


So we know your Journal is current, – up to date, and thorough. I did enjoy reading of your adventures; and I can see how the length, breadth and depth could deter someone from reading much of them.(dear Brandon, this gave me a big belly laugh!)


Since I have noticed myself skipping the impersonal (to me) parts, and looking for the conversational notes.


Dave Hughes would be your mailman, and the name of the dogcatcher. :-)


Okay so you question me on importance of brothels and hookers.


Sexual frustration is a main reason for fights and arguments, and is a very real stressed that needs for lease on a seemingly regular basis depending on how active someone is. Exercising regularly builds testosterone faster than laziness.


Anyway, please send no more books. There is only one approved book vendor. And I am hesitant to let you know what it's called. So anyway, reason being… I refuse to be a drain further on your funds. Especially if books won't be read. (dear Brandon, thank you for your consideration. Little do you know how much I have thoroughly enjoyed sharing all those books with you. Do you remember Horatio Hornblower?)


I'm glad to know you are doing well, even if I failed to help you get to know me. ;-)


Thank you for your constant, unwavering, consistent effort to make me feel, if not worthy, important and loved.


I feel, that's FEEL, stuck. [dear Brandon, Mark Clayton would love you! He deals with people feeling stuck all the time. It is true. It is a feeling.]


I FEEL as though God wants me here, and when I die (the date can't arrive soon enough) God will again send me, away from him, to where he wants me to be.


I can only do the best I can in any situation, that's the only way I know how to be.


Goals? Achievements? Plans? I have none. I have surrendered what is.


There are many things of greater worth, then me, that you were free to focus on.


You are wonderful; keep smiling because we know God will have his way, even if we don't understand why something has to go, or be, a certain way.


Look more empty lines…


Thank you for everything.


You are marvelous.


Listen to Adele's “A Million Years Ago”.


I only wanted to have fun


Learning to fly, learning to run


I let my heart decide the way


When I was young


Deep down I must have always known


That this would be inevitable


To earn my stripes I'd have to pay


And bear my soul


I know I'm not the only one


Who regrets the things they've done


Sometimes I just feel it's only me


Who can't stand the reflection that they see


I wish I could live a little more


Look up to the sky, not just the floor


I feel like my life is flashing by


And all I can do is watch and cry


I miss the air, I miss my friends


I miss my mother, I miss it when


Life was a party to be thrown


But that was a million years ago


When I walk around all of the streets


Where I grew up and found my feet


They can't look me in the eye


It's like they're scared of me


I try to think of things to say


Like a joke or a memory


But they don't recognize me now


In the light of day


I know I'm not the only one


Who regrets the things they've done


Sometimes I just feel it's only me


Who never became who they thought they'd be


I wish I could live a little more


Look up to the sky, not just the floor


I feel like my life is flashing by


And all I can do is watch and cry


I miss the air, I miss my friends


I miss my mother, I miss it when


Life was a party to be thrown


But that was a million years ago


A million years ago


Open your heart to feelings and you will get hurt.


God loves us all, and giving his only begotten son was very painful to him.


Love is painful.


And so is the learning period in the furnace of affliction.


The gospel is no coward's religion.


Be courageous, it is difficult.


But it gets easier in the consistent practice of it. :-)


I never wanted to hurt anyone. Not even for a second. (Dear Brandon, you sweetheart. I understand. Same with me.)


But now, I still can't forget a certain person I won't name. (Dear Brandon, me too. I understand. Same with me.)


Thank you again my friend.


Keep holding on to the rock.


– Brandon


PS. There are mistakes when use Dragon speak to type letters. (Dear Brandon, you're right.) [When was the last time I cried when reading your letter? I'm not sure. Thank you.-v]

Thursday, February 8, 2018

SEB



Tuesday, 2/6/18 Hello Brandon, I get to go to a lecture by George Durrant and Susan Easton Black again today at 2. Janice Divine says she went by at 1 last Tuesday and there were people lined up to go in. (An hour early!!) I don’t think anyone will take the seat I discovered last week. I sit on the kiddie stool that they use to prop kids up for their testimonies! It is placed on the stand on the east side just behind the Priest’s sacrament bench. I sat there last week for the first time. I went in at 1:45 and they had already begun because the building was full. What? Mormons early to a meeting? What in the world is going on? @ I have a emeritus drugged out Nephew, Nate’95 who says he took the sacrament for the first time in years this week. He posted 98 times on fb last week. When I saw how much he was posting and since I didn’t have you to need me so much, I felt inspired to invite him to write a joint blog with me. He chose the name onwardandupward2.blogspot.com from the choices I offered him. He could have made up a name of his own but he didn’t. 10 days have gone by on that blog. He has contributed 3 times. Yes! @ I was feeling lost and incapable and impatient about dialoguing with him on Sunday. As I reclined in my prayer chair I got an idea. Yes, I was praying in my prayer chair. The idea was, that I really didn’t need to wait any longer. By starting the joint blog I had crossed a bridge. Nate had joined me. My messages on fb might be more acceptable to him now. I facebooked him and he responded. Then the next day he wrote on our blog. Live and Learn. I am just feeling this one out. @As you know I often just use intials for apostles: LTP, JS, BY, GBH, TSM, DHO, RMN, MRB, HBE, DFU, etc. I am going to use SEB for Susan Easton Black. Last week she told us how OCD she is. She hunted for years for every different name used for Jesus Christ in the Book of Mormon. I love Jesus Christ. I decided to hunt up all those names. This is what I found on the internet:101 names of Christ in the book of Mormon by Susan Easton Black


Almighty


Almighty God


Alpha and Omega


Being


Beloved


Beloved Son


Christ


Christ Jesus


Christ the Son


Counselor


Great Creator


Great Spirit


Head


Holy Child


Holy God


Holy Messiah


Holy One


Holy One of Israel


Holy One of Jacob


Husband


Immanuel


Jehovah


Jesus


Jesus Christ


Keeper of the gate


King


King of heaven


Lamb


Lamb of God


Lord


Lord God


Lord God Almighty


Lord God omnipotent


Lord God of Hosts


Lord Jehovah


Lord Jesus


Lord Jesus Christ


Lord of Hosts


Lord of the vineyard


Lord Omnipotent


Maker


Man


Master


Mediator


Messiah


Mighty God


Mighty One of Israel


Mighty One of Jacob


Most High


Most High God


Only Begotten of the Father


Only Begotten Son


Prince of Peace


Prophet


Rabbanah


Redeemer


Only Begotten Son


Prince of Peace


Redeemer of Israel


Redeemer of the world


Rock


Savior


Savior Jesus Christ


Savior of the World


Shepherd


Son


Son of God


Son of Righteousness


Son of the Eternal Father


Son of the Everlasting God


Son of the Living God


Son of the Most High God


Stone


Supreme Being


Supreme Creator


True and living God


True Messiah


True shepherd


True vine


Well Beloved


Wonderful


The guy who copied her pages from her book must have blown it. Where are the rest? On her chart she shows which books each name is found in and how many times. When I attended her lecture last Tuesday I was disappointed she didn’t share the awesome stories about JS’s childhood or life that she had 2 weeks before. But as the days went by I realized how what she had shared had touched me. As you know the Book of Mormon proclaims to be another witness of/for Jesus Christ. You won’t believe this brandon, she found him in the first verse and the last verse and every 1.7 verses in between. Have you ever noticed what name is used for him in the first verse? Or the last verse? Eternal Judge is the one used in the last verse. That one scares her she says. @ In order to get a list of His names I used Dragon speak to dictate them all. I felt a special spirit just saying them. Guess how it compares to the OT and the NT? @ What a creative blessing the BoM is for us. @@@ I doubled my paxil yesterday. My feelings have been so labile/ mercurial/ fluctuating/ undulating/ unpredictable this last month. Instead of taking a half pill I took a whole one. Yippee, I have the option!


Understanding Emotional Lability


Emotional lability occurs because of damage to parts of the brain that control: Awareness of emotions (ours and others) Ability to control how emotions are expressed – so ability to inhibit or stop emotions coming out Stronger emotional responses When a person is emotionally labile emotions can be out of proportion to the situation or environment the person is in. For example, a person may cry, even when they are not unhappy – they may cry just in response to strong emotions or feelings, or it may happen “out of the blue” without warning. A person may have little control over the expression of these strong emotions, and they may not be connected to any specific event or person. Following brain injury an individual may also lose emotional awareness and sensitivity to their own and other’s emotions, and therefore their capacity to control their emotional behaviour may also be reduced. They may overreact to people or events around them – conversations about particular topics, sad or funny movies or stories. Weaker emotional control and lower frustration tolerance, particularly with fatigue and stress can also result in more extreme changes in emotional responses. The person may express their emotions in situations where previously they would have been able to been restrained or in control (in quiet situations, in church, listening to a concert, the library). These behaviours can be confusing, embarrassing, and difficult to understand for the person with brain injury and for others. @@@ I lost my inhibitions Sunday and greeted: “Hal, Jesus didn’t go whoring!” @ Oops, looks like I am feeling things to strongly. I am so glad I have kept dosing with at least a half a pill each day so increasing the dosage won’t be difficult. TYHF. @ It is hard to admit that mental illness runs in my family. Not, me. I’m not crazy! @@@ Steve Burdick asked to be a Facebook friend this weekend. Usually I check them out and see who they are first. This time I figured if he wants to be friends it is OK with me. Lo and behold he messages me that he so appreciated my blog about the Funeral of Jake Foote that I wrote in 2014! He just found out about it and he said my blog filled him in and gave him peace. What? Did I write a blog about Jake Foote? I wondered what I called it and how he found it? I googled Jake Foote and sure enough there was AdventureBill with his blog. :) \\\Wednesday 2/7/18 Hello Brandon, I am about done at family search today. Here is a talk I wanted to reread because she read it so fast in church in December. @@@Joni, Are you up to sharing your talk?\
I know I would benefit from rereading it. I also write and inmate who I like to share wonderful ward talks with. I post everything on adventurebill1, my blogspot. No one bothers to read it but it makes me feel productive.\So not only are you not teaching gospel doctrine any more, but neither are your replacements! So long ShannonJ and JesseB.\I have told Alex that I like how his brain works. FrankH commented on his talk in priesthood.\Thank you for your consideration.\Joni Gardine\Feb 2 (5 days ago)to me
Vern, I've attached a copy of my talk from a month ago. I hope it does some good. :)\
vern jensen <phonev6@gmail.com>\Feb 2 (5 days ago)\to Joni \Yay!\You win!\Thank you.\It will do me some good if no one else! :) [bps, smily faces all over the place. So Brandon, Joni told me she was willing when we crossed paths as I distributed my special children’s ages ward phone list on a legal sheet. If she had gotten me hers quickly, she has a new baby son, her first son, 4 daughters, I would have tried for her intimidating tall attorney husbands talk as well. Now it is long enough ago I won’t bother. ] Today is New Year’s Eve. Some of you may be big on New Year’s resolutions--others not so much. I think it is safe to say that most of us do a little looking inward as a year draws to a close. [bps, had a huge year!] Whatever your approach to the New Year, I propose that you add to your year-end-soul searching the question, “What does my Heavenly Father need me to FORGIVE?” Search your heart and see if there is not some lingering resentment, some grudge, something that has laid unforgiven, whether large or small that is holding you back from what the Lord needs you to be. Think of it like two tight fists. (hold up fists) If you hold on like this, refusing to let go on past wrongs, either that have been done to you, or those you have done and can’t seem to forgive yourself for--holding on tightly, your hands are not open to receive. When you choose to forgive yourself and others YOU are opening your hands to receive what the Lord has in store for you. [this demonstration was involving Brandon,v]


We obviously know that we are commanded to forgive. The Lord said, “10 I, the Lord, will forgive whom I will forgive, but of you it is required to forgive all men. (d&C 64:10). As in all things, Christ is who we should look to as our greatest example. He showed us how importance forgiveness was multiple times during his life, but never as profoundly as during his crucifixion. Jesus Christ literally stopped in the middle of unimaginable pain--dying on the cross--to forgive. And, not for someone remorseful, repentant and begging for forgiveness, either. [good point-v]


He paused in the middle of his suffering to plead to the Father for forgiveness for those who had crucified him, praying “forgive them, for they know not what they do” [they knew not, they had no idea! Even the leaders really had no idea! Nothing like this had ever happened before. How were they supposed to understand. The apostles couldn’t even understand there would be a resurrection! But what about kindness? That was the leaders major fault in my opinion. How often are we kind?-v]


I believe that there are some lessons here for us in this final act of Christ that can help us in our journey to practice forgiveness more fully in our lives. I’d like to focus first on the manner in which He prayed for those who had harmed him.


Praying for those that have hurt us is an incredibly powerful thing. When it comes to seeking to forgive, I believe there is no step more important. It’s not always easy, and sometimes the words come slowly, but the result has always been the same. Each time I am amazed at the peace and love that washes over me for the person I am praying for. Now, to be perfectly honest, there have been times that after returning to my feet and going about my day, the unkind feelings have returned. I have needed to repeat this praying process many times over days, weeks, and in one particular case, years, but the results have been miraculous. [
This reminded me of the opening scene of “Fiddler on the Roof,” in which the rabbi's son asks if there is “a proper blessing for the czar.” ... He ponders awhile, then pronounces: “Of course: May God bless and keep the czar — far away from us.” I can't do this yet Brandon. I am still at the protect myself stage.-v]


All of us have hurtful things happen to us. We cannot escape it. It is a necessary part of this human experience. Often the deepest pain comes from those closest to us. When such things happen, praying for those that have hurt us can bring healing and peace.


So it was with Moses. While he was leading the children of Israel through the wilderness to the promised land, his brother Aaron and sister Miriam became jealous of him. They gossiped about Moses, saying hurtful things about him and his wife. How many of us can unfortunately relate to his feelings of betrayal that Moses must have felt? Moses prayed for them, and most specifically for Miriam who had contracted leprosy. Heavenly Father heard the prayers of Moses and Miriam was healed. Their relationship was healed, as well.


We are all familiar with the story of Job--his struggles and misfortunes were more than many of us could bear. He lost his livelihood, his family and his health. During this time, his friends judged him and his situation.They told him that he had brought these things upon himself, that he must have done something to deserve it. Put yourself in Job’s position--Has something similar happened to you? Have you been judged wrongly, even by those closest to you even in the midst of a difficult time in your life? It can be difficult in situations such as this to feel forgiveness in your heart. God chastised the friends of Job. BUT--He also told Job to pray for them.


I can imagine that what happened to Job was something similar to what I have experienced when I have prayed for those that have hurt me or for whom I have unkind feelings. A feeling of peace has come over me and I am amazingly, in that moment[v-but only in that moment!], able to love them and see them as children of God. I am granted perspective I did not have before. I see things through a lens of love and clarity. My load seems lighter. I think that is what it means in the scriptures when it says:10 And the Lord turned the captivity of Job, when he prayed for his friends[I don't understand this yet.v]:It was also an important piece of the healing process for everyone involved. The scriptural account of Job goes on to say, :11 Then came there unto him all his brethren, and all his sisters, and all they that had been of his acquaintance before, and did eat bread with him in his house: and they bemoaned him, and comforted him over all the evil that the Lord had brought upon him: every man also gave him a piece of money, and every one an earring of gold.The hearts of his friends had been changed, as well.\


Another thing that struck me about this account of Christ forgiving on the cross is that : HE DID IT QUICKLY--EVEN IN THE MIDST OF HIS SUFFERING\He didn’t waste any time. He did not put conditions on his forgiveness, such as waiting until they were sorry, until they asked for forgiveness, or until they saw they were wrong. I understand that there are things that are incredibly hurtful that quite honestly take time to process, sort out and handle.[well said. v] There are also things that happen to us , small grievances, throughout the day that we should forgive quickly and move on. Instead, we may find it tempting to roll around in the grudge a bit, prolonging the drama of it all. This is not the Lord’s way. Whether the offense is large or small, I believe that the Lord is teaching us here to forgive as quickly as we can. The Lord admonishes us in Matthew that we should settle our disputes quickly, which is very sound advice. I believe that this encompasses forgiving and moving on, as well. The quicker we can do it, the quicker we are able to feel the full presence of the Spirit with us again and the stronger our relationships will be. [ I usually add up the offenses and keep track until I can't take any more. v]


There is a wonderful example from the lives of Joseph and Emma Smith that illustrates this point. The following is from the writings of David Whitmer, who witnessed the incident:\“Joseph Smith was a religious and straightforward man. . . . He had to trust in God. He could not translate unless he was humble and possessed the right feelings towards everyone.\To illustrate so you can see: One morning when he was getting ready to continue the translation, something went wrong about the house and he was put out about it. Something that Emma, his wife, had done.\Oliver and I went upstairs and Joseph came up soon after to continue the translation but he could not do anything. He could not translate a single syllable.\He went downstairs, out into the orchard, and made supplication to the Lord; was gone about an hour—came back to the house, and asked Emma’s forgiveness and then came upstairs where we were and then the translation went on all right.\He could do nothing save he was humble and faithful.”\Now--an important point is that, according to David Whitmer--it was Emma who had done something that upset Joseph--not the other way around. But, what is wonderful is that Joseph prayed and thereafter came to ask forgiveness of EMMA. Often when we pray and meditate upon a certain offense, we are able to see our own part in the matter more clearly. He took responsibility for his part, asked for Emma’s forgiveness and was blessed with the Spirit again and the ability to translate.


So it is with us. If we are holding onto a grudge, an offense, or even an annoyance that we let fester--we harm our relationships, and block ourselves from the full measure of the Spirit, leaving us unable to move forward with what the Lord has for us to do. Like Joseph Smith, we should take care of it as soon as possible.When we make forgiving quickly a habit we are better able to devote our energies to our families and other worthwhile things in our lives.


Pres. James E. Faust shared the following:


“If we can find forgiveness in our hearts for those who have caused us hurt and injury, we will rise to a higher level of self-esteem and well-being. Some recent studies show that people who are taught to forgive become “less angry, more hopeful, less depressed, less anxious and less stressed,” which leads to greater physical well-being.9 Another of these studies concludes “that forgiveness … is a liberating gift [that] people can give to themselves. .”


I particularly love that last sentence :forgiveness … is a liberating gift [that] people can give to themselves.” Doesn’t it make sense that if all of these benefits await us on the other side of forgiveness, we should try to get there as quickly as we can?


Another lesson from Christ is that HE HAD PERSPECTIVE:


Christ saw these men who had crucified him as SONS OF GOD. He had a knowledge of them and a love for them that we could only aspire to emulate. He also knew that, in his words “they know not what they do”. We can apply this in our own lives, as we try to put ourselves in the place of others, giving them the benefit of the doubt, trying to see things from their perspective. [I agree. Top marks for this one! v]


Christ also kept an eternal perspective. He knew that in three days he would be resurrected, that this was not the end. When you know that what God has before you is bigger than what has happened behind you, you are better able to put hurtful things in context. Forgiveness becomes easier.


Mark Nepo, a philosopher, tells the following story:


A spiritual teacher grew tired of his student complaining, and so, one morning, sent him for some salt. When the student returned, the teacher instructed the unhappy young man to put a handful of salt in a glass of water and then to drink it.


“How does it taste?” the teacher asked.


“Bitter,” said the student.


The teacher chuckled and then asked the young man to take the same handful of salt and put it in the lake. The two walked in silence to the nearby lake, and once the student swirled his handful of salt in the water, the old man said, “Now drink from the lake.”


As the water dripped down the young man’s chin, the teacher asked, “How does it taste?”


“Fresh,” remarked the student.


“Do you taste the salt?” asked the teacher.


“No,” said the young man.


At this, the teacher said, “The pain of life is pure salt; no more, no less. The amount of pain in life remains the same, exactly the same. But the amount of bitterness we taste depends on the container we put the pain in. So when you are in pain, the only thing you can do is to enlarge your sense of things. . . . Stop being a glass. Become a lake.”


To me, this story illustrates the power of putting things in their proper perspective. This is best done by trying to see ourselves and others as Christ does.


(ENDING) Dr. Sidney Simon,an author, provided an excellent definition of forgiveness:


“Forgiveness is freeing up and putting to better use the energy once consumed by holding grudges, harboring resentments, and nursing unhealed wounds. It is rediscovering the strengths we always had and relocating our limitless capacity to understand and accept other people and ourselves.”5


On this New Years Eve, as you look on to a new year, follow Christ’s example of forgiving. Leave the grudges, the self inflicted wounds, even the purposeful hurts brought about by others behind. Furthermore, forgive yourself for those sins you have repented of and for the weaknesses that seem to show up everyday. Show the compassion to yourself that you would show those that you love. Pray for those who have hurt you, those you find difficult to forgive.


Start fresh with open hands and an open heart, ready for the Lord to use you for his ultimate good. [I wish and I try. v]


Know that what God has in store for you is beyond what you can comprehend at this time. To whom much is given, much is required. You can’t expect God to use you to a higher capacity if your heart and mind are consumed with an old hurt. Your Saviour Jesus Christ has brought about the Atonement which covers these wrongs. Take them to Him. Lay them at His feet. He will heal your heart and mind. He will heal your relationships. He has that power. Your Heavenly Father has so many blessings in store for you, if you would simply unclench your fists, let the grudges, resentments, and offenses go--and come to Him with open hands and open hearts ready to serve and love.[It is so much harder than that!v]


I know that He will bless you and through you, bless the lives others more fully if you will make the choice to forgive.


AMEN



Joni Gardine was our gospel doctrine teacher 2 years ago. She was tall a great to look at. As you can tell she can think! I do all I can to support gospel teachers. So as you can imagine she knows me very well from the classroom. What did you think of her talk? What did you think of my comments? Did you agree or disagree? @ Thurs 2/8/18 I got a phone call from Heidi yesterday. I called back while walking Molly near midnight. No answer of course. :) Who was Heidi? Why would she call me? When I listened to my vmail I heard that she was asking me to substitute for teaching our BoM class since she has elementary teaching obligations. I responded, Sure, I would be happy to. I started getting so excited inside while walking Molly. I am really going to do a dog and pony show. [What is a dog-and-pony show? This disparaging term goes back to the 1920s, when actual dog and pony shows competed with far more elaborate circuses. Many times the dog-and-pony offerings served as a front to hoochie-coochie shows or tents serving illegal alcohol. Over time, in the worlds of politics, business, and the military, the term was transferred to perfunctory or picayune presentations.] Have you ever seen a picture of a soft heart? A hard heart? I found some lds.org coloring book pictures that have them. I will send you one. I am planning to give everyone the pictures and maybe have us take notes around the edges. @ My assignment is the last 4 chapters of 1 Nephi. Nephi starts by telling them about Isaiah, Zenock, Zenos, Neum from the brass plates. They have just arrived in America. Then he copies Isaiah 48 and 49 and then he explains. The adventure of arriving at the promised land is over. Let the preaching begin! 2 Nephi is all preaching too. Wonderful, wonderful books. Written on small plates at the end of Nephi’s life when he thought he was done recording their history. Nope. Not done. Time to make some new plates and on these ones just put the most spiritual things! And we have them. The large plates are like all the newspapers of the world. The small plates are like our General Conference talks. Which do you prefer? @My testimony is particularly strong today. After studying 1N 19 & 22 last night I can see that HF sees and knows the big picture. A few weeks ago I learned that Nephi’s brother Jacob had more feelings than any other prophet in the BoM. In my lability I appreciate others who had strong feelings as well. I was wiped out with the tarring of Joseph Smith lecture I attended on Tuesday. Joseph Smith seems like he was an extremely sensitive man as well. In fact he tells of not needing the Urim and Thummim any more because he had gotten used to seeing things the way it showed him. Can you imagine? @ Joni talked about perspective in her talk. If we can keep the perspective that we are spiritual beings in a temporal world we can let things run off our backs like water on a ducks feathers. As you know words like those in 1N22 are so potent that we can’t take them all in. They blow our minds and we just can’t fathom them any longer. JosephS lamented that he couldn’t prepare the people well enough to accept all the revelations he had received. He just gave them as much as they could handle. And for some of them that was more than they could handle. If we could gaze into heaven for 5 minutes we would know more than reading everything in the world written on the subject. gby-bltpjs-



Wednesday, January 31, 2018

Goodbye Brandon, until we meet again.

12 ways to say goodbye in other languages

Despite their different constructions and etymologies, expressions of parting across languages tend to communicate similar things, many of them outlining the hope of meeting again. English has borrowed many of the following foreign expressions of parting, so you’ve probably encountered some of these ways to say goodbye in other languages.

1. adiós, adieu, addio, adeus

Besides adieu in French, there are also adiós in Spanish, addio in Italian, and adeus in Portuguese. Adieu comes from the combination of Dieu (‘to God’); adiosaddio, and adeus have similar etymologies.

2. aloha

This Hawaiian word is used as both a welcome and farewell, but also for expressions of good wishes, love, and affection. Because of how often the term is used Hawaii has taken on the nickname of the Aloha State.

3. arrivederci

In Italian, arrivederci means ‘until we see each other again’. You might be tempted by the arrive- to think that the word has something to do with a greeting, but the word actually comes from (‘until’) + rivederci (‘we see each other again’).

4. ciao

Ciao has an intriguing origin: in the 1920s, ciao arose as a dialectal alteration of schiavo, which translates as ‘(I am your) slave’. Like alohaciao does double duty as both a term of greeting and parting.

5. auf Wiedersehen

A common send off in Germany is auf Wiedersehen. This farewell directly translates into ‘until we see again’.

6. au revoir

Similar to auf Wiedersehen, au revoir directly translates as ‘to the seeing again’, anticipating a meeting in the future.

7. bon voyage

Another common French term with widespread usage is bon voyage, ‘good journey’, used to express good wishes to someone who is about to embark on a trip.

8. sayonara

Short for sayō naraba, which literally translates as ‘if it be thus’, sayonara is used, according to the OED, to ‘qualify desire to meet again so as not to tempt fate’. Additionally, sayonara is used in English to suggest that something has been finished with, abandoned, or consigned to the past in more general usage, as in ‘you can say sayonara to that those tasty plums’.

9. shalom

The Hebrew word can be used as both a welcome and farewell. Shalom is the widespread Hebrew goodbye that translates as ‘peace’, but a more formal parting would be to say shalom aleichem or ‘peace be with you’.

10. totsiens

South Africans might send each other off by saying totsiens, which means ‘until we meet again’. This word entered English from Afrikaans in the 1930s, originating from Dutch words tot ‘until’ and zien ‘see’.

11. vale

Another interesting valediction is the archaic farewell vale, meaning ‘goodbye’ in Latin. The word comes from the second person singular imperative of valēre, ‘to be well’.

12. zàijiàn

A common send-off in China is 再见(zàijiàn). The verb ‘to bid farewell’ is expressed with  (ɡàobié).





January 11, 2018.
Ah, my friend (who wishes I would talk about something, anything, everything) Vern, thank you :-) you are wonderful.
Well, it is a new year, and I thought I'd better write this new years letter early. :-)
I think more books of been rejected due to not being an authorized vendor. Did you order books from “Better World Books”?
If not, hopefully the refund will let them know I can't get them.
If so, please REFRAIN from trying to send the books: I have little time for reading and struggle to fit in a chapter of the book of Mormon each day.
With one exception, feel free to log onto the internet, type in: SIcovers.com, and order me the swimsuit issue. :-) A past issue, or the new one comes in February.
Maybe this is a test for you, since you teased me with the calendars I couldn't get, to see if he'll order me something I can get. ;-)
Well, keep up the marvelous work.
I am doing well, nothing to report.
Hold fast; for something shall be forthcoming worth mentioning. Hopefully.
Brandon

Mark Clayton would have recognized my feelings as being very volatile this last month.