It
must be very clear to us, then, that we must still forgive without
retaliation or vengeance, for the Lord will do for us such as is
necessary. … Bitterness injures the one who carries it; it hardens
and shrivels and cankers. @It frequently happens that offenses are
committed when the offender is not aware of it. Something he has said
or done is misconstrued or misunderstood. The offended one treasures
in his heart the offense, adding to it such other things as might
give fuel to the fire and justify his conclusions. Perhaps this is
one of the reasons why the Lord requires that the offended one should
make the overtures toward peace. @“And if thy brother or sister
offend thee, thou shalt take him or her between him or her and thee
alone; and if he or she confess thou shalt be reconciled.” (D&C
42:88.)
… @Do we follow that command or do we sulk in our bitterness,
waiting for our offender to learn of it and to kneel to us in
remorse? @We may get angry with our parents, or a teacher, or the
bishop, and dwarf ourselves into nameless anonymity as we shrivel and
shrink under the venom and poison of bitterness and hatred. While the
hated one goes on about his business, little realizing the suffering
of the hater, the latter cheats himself. @Wednesday, 8/12/15, 2:57pm
Hello Brandon, welcome to the world of forgiveness! I wrote you
yesterday and I WAS quite stirred up. I used that nervous energy to
write you. I included the letter I wrote to my EQ president and
Bishop. Did I dare to deliver them? Yikes, scary! And if I did
deliver them did I feel like I was on pins and needles until I got a
response? Answers: I sent the Bishop's to him email. I texted DaveB
last night and asked if he had left town yet. He hadn't and so I
walked Molly over to his house around the back block. Do you remember
what the back block means? @ I knew I had to do it. It wouldn't have
been done and out of my hands until I had. Yes, I was nervous. DaveB
did not answer his door. Relief. I am really good and slipping
letters between the door frame and the door so it is not even visible
outside but seems to be protruding out of the wall on the inside! Is
that a skill you have practiced? Ha, ha. @ I had printed off a
picture of rib steaks from Lins last month on sale for $5 each/8oz.
HalD provided that for one Father's and Son's and offered to do it
again this year and was turned down. He is an active excommunicated
member of our ward! Do you know any of those? As you know I love to
surround myself with people with brains and he has one. He drove one
family from the ward because they couldn't stand his constant
participation in SS. Last week I noticed he came in 5 minutes after
SS had begun. I suspect he skips sacrament meeting. Duane Derfler
mentioned HalD in his sacrament meeting talk last month and he wasn't
there to hear it. When I told him about it in SS, HalD said, they
already told me! So, there are many of us that are reaching out to
him and trying to help him feel loved and accepted. He is a little
5'3” man who works construction and puts in swimming pools and
lives on the busy main thoroughfare, Fort Pierce Drive. He quotes
Hugh Nibley and all these other guys who have written scriptural
commentaries. He quotes the dead sea scrolls and all kinds of weird
writings. Mad kumani library or something like that. I wanted to get
to understand him this last year so I have gone out of my way to
include and salute him as well. He loves church hymns and follows
very closely what I choose to sing. @ I have probably described him
to You before. @ Since I had to make that daring drop off to DaveB
last night I figured I would visit HalD as well. He never answers his
phone because everyone begs him for money. He says he was generous
once and now they won't leave him alone. So that makes him difficult
to contact! I accidentally on purpose took him a frozen fish last
spring so I would have an ulterior motive for talking to him.
Surprise, surprise he loved it! A couple of weeks later I took him 9
more. So last night I took him 10 more and asked if the others were
gone and he said assuredly! I showed him the Lin's sale on rib steaks
and asked where he had gotten his and how much they cost. His were
$4/lb from Costco. Thank heavens he did not pay $10/lb like Lins is
advertising! That is something I admire him for doing! Very different
than Sister Hawkins I told you about yesterday! @ See. That is the
kind of good works I like to celebrate. I wasn't even there the year
he fed all the Fathers and Sons. Not true. I could have been there
but living my restricted diet: no seasonings and providing all my own
food. @ Why did it take me a month to show HalD the sale? I wasn't
motivated. But when the fear/anxiety/ adrenaline is already running I
just as well take advantage of it. Are you learning anything Brandon?
When you start allowing yourself to feel you might need that
technique : ) @ I started the letter with potent doctrine from SWK.
It was in Chapter 9 of his years priesthood manual, copyright 2006. @
Yesterday I sent you a few verses from Matthew and that was the best
I could do to document my stand. Today I found these as well. Isn't
it the strangest thing to be told to go let the person know who has
offended you? @ Big huge pause to consider. Are you kidding? Sticks
and stones may break my bones but names will never hurt me! @ Big
boys don't cry. And I don't! I can't! It goes too much against the
grain and I can't. @ I do have tears of joy and happiness come to my
eyes. Tears of love and tears of reassurance and fulfillment. But not
tears of sadness. @ We were beat regularly as kids and Brent'57 had a
will that couldn't be broken. WE have a family story about him
outrunning my father around our yard and house so fast he took
forever to catch! I also remember him not giving in to screaming or
crying when he was beat at one stage of his life. Not me'55. I
figured the louder and sooner I bust a gut in screaming bloody
murder, the sooner it would end! I debated trying to do what Brent
did, I may have even tried it a time or two, but I am convinced he
just got beat longer and harder to break him. @ So, controlling our
emotions in public is an almost hardwired skill. It comes early,
early. @ But then how do you let go in private? How serious would it
have to be before you were able to cry? I suspect you are like me and
could cry in sadness for the loss or death of another person but to
cry in pain isn't something we can do. @ My sweet daughters can. Does
that mean they feel things more intensely than I do? Probably. @ Did
the bishop reply by email? Yes, and I feel relieved. It is not
reasonable I know, but I felt like my head was on the chopping block.
And I so did not want to be in trouble. Do you remember the size of
my “in trouble” button? Well, I am not! Relief again! @ I had to
reread what I had written a couple of times to see what it was the
bishop was responding to. And I felt good about what I had shared.
There was much more I could have included but that was thorough
enough. @ OK, I'm done for now. See you later. 3:50pm@~@New
Day, welcome to Thursday, Brandon! KJ says you will have a birthday
visit time at 5pm, tomorrow, Friday, 8/14/15, yppaH yadhtriB !! You
did it again. . .you survived another year in Purgatory. I hope this
was your best year so far. I hope you enjoyed the books you have
read, the things you have learned, the scripture(s) I hope you have
memorized, the journal you finally dared to keep, your ability to own
your feelings and share them with God, and I hope you have felt my
love and effort on your behalf. @ I turned 60 last month and I am
already retired as you know! I suspect you are turning 34, but I am
probably off. I just texted KJ to see if she knows about your desire
for the WORK AND THE GLORY series. I have wanted to share with you
the miracles surrounding the Kirtland temple dedication and I decided
to order my set on Sunday using Amazonprime. I ordered and they
cancelled. I updated my credit card and ordered again. This time it
went through. They should arrive t o d a y ! It is always exciting to
see what kind of shape used books are in. It costs $4 shipping for
each book or $4 shipping for all 9 in the series. I went for the all
9! But it cost $63 for the set. At least I did not have the hassle of
finding the best price on all of them individually. @ I have been
storing an unopened ham in the bottom of my fridge for a couple of
months. I decided to open it last night. It is spiral sliced and so
easy to serve. When I checked the sell by date it was in May. It was
packaged in March. Since ham is cured it is already cooked and ready
to eat. But having mine expired so long ago I decided I better cook
it first. Darn! I boiled up some pieces last night and they did not
taste all that rich, potent, delicious. I decided to cut all the
meat off and roast it today. I spread it all out in a huge baking pan
so I wouldn't have to cook it hours on end waiting for the heat to
get to the center. I put 5 carrots on top so they will taste good and
since they take so long to cook they will be an indication of
doneness. : ) I put the big tray in the fridge after cooking and I
am thinking of taking it to Singles BoM class tonight to share. Weird
idea I know. @ OCTOBER 2005 THE SANCTITY OF THE BODY @Susan W.
Tanner @Young Women General President @I have just returned from a
visit where I welcomed into the world our newest little
granddaughter, Elizabeth Claire Sandberg. She is perfect! I was
awestruck, as I am each time a baby is born, with her fingers, toes,
hair, beating heart, and her distinctive family characteristics—nose,
chin, dimples. Her older brothers and sister were equally excited and
fascinated by their tiny, perfect little sister. They seemed to sense
a holiness in their home from the presence of a celestial spirit
newly united with a pure physical body. @In the premortal realm we
learned that the body was part of God’s great plan of happiness for
us. As it states in the family proclamation: “Spirit sons and
daughters knew and worshiped God as their Eternal Father and accepted
His plan by which His children could obtain a physical body and gain
earthly experience to progress toward perfection and ultimately
realize his or her divine destiny as an heir of eternal life” (“The
Family: A Proclamation to the World,” Liahona, Oct. 2004, 49;
Ensign, Nov. 1995, 102). In fact, we “shouted for joy” (Job 38:7)
to be part of this plan. @Why were we so excited? We understood
eternal truths about our bodies. We knew that our bodies would be in
the image of God. We knew that our bodies would house our spirits. We
also understood that our bodies would be subject to pain, illness,
disabilities, and temptation. But we were willing, even eager, to
accept these challenges because we knew that only with spirit and
element inseparably connected could we progress to become like our
Heavenly Father (see D&C 130:22) and “receive a fulness of joy”
(D&C 93:33). @With the fulness of the gospel on the earth, we are
again privileged to know these truths about the body. Joseph Smith
taught: “We came to this earth that we might have a body and
present it pure before God in the Celestial Kingdom. The great
principle of happiness consists in having a body. The Devil has no
body, and herein is his punishment” (The Words of Joseph Smith, ed.
Andrew F. Ehat and Lyndon W. Cook [1980], 60). @Satan learned these
same eternal truths about the body, and yet his punishment is that he
does not have one. Therefore he tries to do everything he can to get
us to abuse or misuse this precious gift. He has filled the world
with lies and deceptions about the body. He tempts many to defile
this great gift of the body through unchastity, immodesty,
self-indulgence, and addictions. He seduces some to despise their
bodies; others he tempts to worship their bodies. In either case, he
entices the world to regard the body merely as an object. In the face
of so many satanic falsehoods about the body, I want to raise my
voice today in support of the sanctity of the body. I testify that
the body is a gift to be treated with gratitude and respect. @The
scriptures declare that the body is a temple. It was Jesus Himself
who first compared His body to a temple (see John 2:21). Later Paul
admonished the people of Corinth, a wicked city teeming with all
manner of lasciviousness and indecency: “Know ye not that ye are
the temple of God, and that the Spirit of God dwelleth in you? If any
man defile the temple of God, him shall God destroy; for the temple
of God is holy, which temple ye are” (1 Cor. 3:16–17). @What
would happen if we truly treated our bodies as temples? The result
would be a dramatic increase in chastity, modesty, observance of the
Word of Wisdom, and a similar decrease in the problems of pornography
and abuse, for we would regard the body, like the temple, as a sacred
sanctuary of the Spirit. Just as no unclean thing may enter the
temple, we would be vigilant to
keep
impurity of any sort from entering the temple of our bodies.
@Likewise, we would keep the outside of our bodily temples looking
clean and beautiful to reflect the sacred and holy nature of what is
inside, just as the Church does with its temples. We should dress and
act in ways that reflect the sacred spirit inside us. @A short while
ago as I visited one of the great tourist-filled cities of the world,
I felt an overwhelming sadness that so many people in the world had
fallen prey to Satan’s deception that our bodies are merely objects
to be flaunted and displayed openly. Imagine the contrast and my joy
when I entered a classroom of modestly and appropriately dressed
young women whose countenances glowed with goodness. I thought, “Here
are eight beautiful girls who know how to show respect for their
bodies and who know why they are doing it.” In For the Strength of
Youth it says: “Your body is God’s sacred creation. Respect it as
a gift from God, and do not defile it in any way. Through your dress
and appearance, you can show the Lord that you know how precious your
body is. … The way you dress is a reflection of what you are on the
inside” ([2001], 14–15). @Modesty is more than a matter of
avoiding revealing attire. It describes not only the altitude of
hemlines and necklines but the attitude of our hearts. The word
modesty means “measured.” It is related to moderate. It implies
“decency, and propriety … in thought, language, dress, and
behavior” @Moderation and appropriateness should govern all of our
physical desires. A loving Heavenly Father has given us physical
beauties and pleasures “both to please the eye and to gladden the
heart” (D&C 59:18), but with this caution: that they are “made
to be used, with judgment, not to excess, neither by extortion”
(D&C 59:20). My husband used this scripture to teach our children
about the law of chastity. He said that the “word extortion …
literally means to ‘twist out [or against].’ Our use of … the
body must not be twisted [against] the divinely ordained purposes for
which [it was] given. Physical pleasure is good in its proper time
and place, but even then it must not become our god” @The pleasures
of the body can become an obsession for some; so too can the
attention we give to our outward appearance. Sometimes there is a
selfish excess of exercising, dieting, makeovers, and spending money
on the latest fashions (see Alma 1:27). @I am troubled by the
practice of extreme makeovers. Happiness comes from accepting the
bodies we have been given as divine gifts and enhancing our natural
attributes, not from remaking our bodies after the image of the
world. The Lord wants us to be made over—but in His image, not in
the image of the world, by receiving His image in our countenances
(see Alma 5:14, 19). @I remember well the insecurities I felt as a
teenager with a bad case of acne. I tried to care for my skin
properly. My parents helped me get medical attention. For years I
even went without eating chocolate and all the greasy fast foods
around which teens often socialize, but with no obvious healing
consequences. It was difficult for me at that time to fully
appreciate this body which was giving me so much grief. But my good
mother taught me a higher law. Over and over she said to me, “You
must do everything you can to make your appearance pleasing, but the
minute you walk out the door, forget yourself and start concentrating
on others.” @ There it was. She was teaching me the Christlike
principle of selflessness. Charity, or the pure love of Christ,
“envieth not, and is not puffed up, seeketh not her own” (Moro.
7:45). When we become other-oriented, or selfless, we develop an
inner beauty of spirit that glows in our outward appearance. This is
how we make ourselves in the Lord’s image rather than the world’s
and receive His image in our countenances. President Hinckley spoke
of this very kind of beauty that comes as we learn to respect body,
mind, and spirit. He said: @“Of all the creations of the Almighty,
there is none more beautiful, none more inspiring than a lovely
daughter of God who walks in virtue with an understanding of why she
should do so, who honors and respects her body as a thing sacred and
divine, who cultivates her mind and constantly enlarges the horizon
of her understanding, who nurtures her spirit with everlasting truth”
@Oh, how I pray that all men and women will seek the beauty praised
by the prophet—beauty of body, mind, and spirit! @The restored
gospel teaches that there is an intimate link between body, mind, and
spirit. In the Word of Wisdom, for example, the spiritual and
physical are intertwined. When we follow the Lord’s law of health
for our bodies, we are also promised wisdom to our spirits and
knowledge to our minds (see D&C 89:19–21). The spiritual and
physical truly are linked. @I remember an incident in my home growing
up when my mother’s sensitive spirit was affected by a physical
indulgence. She had experimented with a new sweet roll recipe. They
were big and rich and yummy—and very filling. Even my teenage
brothers couldn’t eat more than one. That night at family prayer my
father called upon Mom to pray. She buried her head and didn’t
respond. He gently prodded her, “Is something wrong?” Finally she
said, “I don’t feel very spiritual tonight. I just ate three of
those rich sweet rolls.” I suppose that many of us have similarly
offended our spirits at times by physical indulgences. Especially
substances forbidden in the Word of Wisdom have a harmful effect on
our bodies and a numbing influence on our spiritual sensitivities.
None of us can ignore this connection of our spirits and bodies.
@These sacred bodies, for which we are so grateful, suffer from
natural limitations. Some people are born with disabilities, and some
suffer the pains of disease throughout their lives. All of us as we
age experience our bodies gradually beginning to fail. When this
happens, we long for the day when our bodies will be healed and
whole. We look forward to the Resurrection that Jesus Christ made
possible, when “the soul shall be restored to the body, and the
body to the soul; yea, and every limb and joint shall be restored to
its body; yea, even a hair of the head shall not be lost; but all
things shall be restored to their proper and perfect frame” (Alma
40:23). I know that through Christ we can experience a fulness of joy
that is available only when spirit and element are inseparably
connected (see D&C 93:33). @Our bodies are our temples. We are
not less but more like Heavenly Father because we are embodied. I
testify that we are His children, made in His image, with the
potential to become like Him. Let us treat this divine gift of the
body with great care. Someday, if we are worthy, we shall receive a
perfected, glorious body—pure and clean like my new little
granddaughter, only inseparably bound to the spirit. And we shall
shout for joy (see Job 38:7) to receive this gift again for which we
have longed (see D&C 138:50). May we respect the sanctity of the
body during mortality so that the Lord may sanctify and exalt it for
eternity. In the name of Jesus Christ, amen. @~@ That talk is worth
reading and pondering over and over again. When I was in Therapy with
MC he pointed me to some lectures by Truman Madsen to help me
understand the value of the body. I had no idea! Sister Tanner did
not reveal that the body was the glory added to us for this life and
forever. And if we keep our second estate our body will not only
continue
giving
us all the wonderful sensations it can, but it can be perfected and
give us the seeds for ever and ever. Of course that is the top degree
of the celestial kingdom. I imagine there well be many who would
prefer not to have that responsibility for eternity. I know Kathx did
not want it. @So I have learned how to care for my body to some
degree. If I had realized it was like HF giving each of us a brand
new Porsche I might have taken a bit better care of it. Have you ever
thought of your body in that way? Strange new idea isn't it. So our
body is glory. It is glorious. It is our gift for keeping our first
estate. 1/3 of HF's children will not receive one. Do you remember in
the novel/ fake biography about Spenser in Visions of Glory, and how
thrilled the devils were to take turns popping in and out of addicts
bodies in the bars? That is the only way they could ever experience
the richness of sensation. @ WE are so blessed and lucky to have
bodies. And I have made it 60 years in basically a righteous,
obedient mode, and I am getting closer to turning mine in for the
ultimate model! @ Ha, ha, you are almost 30 years behind me and have
tons and tons of spiritual and physical care giving ahead of you
before you get to this stage. @ I have done really well in taking
care of my body until this last 2 years. Since my dogs decreased to
one, I have not been exercising as much. And since I love the
sensation of eating on an empty stomach, I only eat each night! And
how exquisite my food tastes! @ There are lots of substances which
have never touched my body. And as strange as it may sound, caffeine
is a medicine I have use very infrequently. But
sugar
and salt is a totally different story. @ So how do we present our
bodies to God when we go to church or the temple? I am often
horrified by the tattoos and piercings people think are OK to do to
their bodies. Last Sunday Sunnie
Adams, the bishop's wife admitted it was a real trial for her to
remove her extra earings
when told to by the prophet. Jesse Bird our SS teacher told how he
almost didn't submit to putting on nicer clothes went sent home by
his stake president. Do we as saints realize what a gift our bodies
are, and how we show our love to God by how we treat them and dress
them? Does the world believe that they own their own body? Part of
our test in this life is to give our minds, energy, heart, will and
body to God. Neal A Maxwell said our will is really the only thing
that is ours to turn over to God. Everything else he has given us and
was his to begin with. @ And see that ye bridle all of your passions,
that ye may be filled with love. @ This
was a brand new dimension for me in therapy. I was learning to not
perpetrate even in my mind. A new dimension. @ God bless you
Brandon. He loves you and is aware of you. As do I.vj
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